Well Get to it, Pardner
by thewrote
Summary: Ryder wants to have a romantic night in with Peebee, but nothing ever goes as planned when your girlfriend is a rogue academic.


They said steam would be what brought them all into the future, but Delilah Ryder wasn't certain she liked the sound of that kind of future. Sure, the train moved plenty fast and the seats didn't come with saddle sores, but they were crowded and hot, and never had she felt so many elbows in her sides.

Admittedly, nothing could beat the time she was making. In only a couple days she was already half way across the country, headed back east to bury her father. It would have been a long, lonely journey on horseback, so if steam powered trains could ease that burden… well, then maybe it was all right in her book.

She shifted, stretching her legs across the aisle until she was as close to laying flat as she could manage. She ignored the glares, repositioned her hat from the top of her head to her over face, and set to getting a bit of shut eye.

"Excuse me but I'm carrying a large stack of books and your legs are in my way."

Ryder peeked from beneath her hat. The sun shinned a beam over the horizon and straight through the grimy window so that she had to squint to get a good look at the lady talking to her.

"Well I'll be," she declared, her feet falling flat on the ground as she struggled to sit back up. "I ain't never seen a blue lady before!"

 _"_ _Wait, wait, wait!" Ryder set her glass down on the table, ice clinking from the force. "Peebee, what is this?"_ _"_ _What do you mean?" Peebee grinned impishly from across the bed. "I'm telling you a fantasy of mine." She slid a leg over the sheets, prodding Ryder's calf with her toes._ _"_ _That's not what I meant and you know it!"_ _"_ _Come on, Ryder, I was just getting to the best part!"_ _"_ _Why do I sound like that, what voice are you making for me?"_ _"_ _Who is the academic here?" Peebee repositioned herself, rolling from her side to her stomach, her legs bent in the air behind her. "Can I finish?"_ _Ryder pressed her lips into a thin line, pinched her fingers over them and pantomimed throwing something off the edge of the bed._ _Peebee cleared her throat._

 **"** If you would excuse me," the finely dressed lady repeated, glowering over a tower of books that was stacked so high it nestled beneath her chin. "Your boots are in my way."

Ryder jumped to her feet, her hat fluttering to the floor between them forgotten. Never in all her days had she seen a woman that looked quite like the one in front of her. Sure, she was blue, but Ryder was an educated woman and she knew that plenty of stranger things could be found across Earth.

While it would be a few hundred more years before humans would make any worthwhile scientific discoveries, a few hundred more before they were even able to get off their inferior rock -

 _"_ _Peebeeeeeee."_ _"_ _Sorry, erm, anyways…"_

"Say, what's your name, Miss?" Without bothering to wait for an answer, Ryder reached for the stack of books and swooped up the top half. She balanced them under her arm and flashed a slow, lopsided smile, a dusting of freckles crinkling across the bridge of her nose.

"Well," the woman, flustered by the attention from the sunburned and dirty gunslinger -

 _"_ _Why am I dirty?"_ _"_ _Shush!"_

\- from the sunburned and dirty gunslinger, clutched her remaining books closer to her chest. "I'm Dr. B'Sayle."

"Well that's a real pretty name."

Dr. B'Sayle giggled and pressed the back of a hand to her cheek. She looked down at their feet and noticed that Ryder's hat had fallen. Embolden by Ryder's own prompt and decisive action, she swooped down to pick it up but as she did the stack of books she was still holding onto tumbled from her grasp.

"Oh my!" she said, falling to her knees at once. "I'm so clumsy." Now she was worried, though she tried to hide it from the gunslinger. If anyone saw what was in her books there would be trouble for sure.

"Well let me help with that," the gunslinger said congenially. She placed the books she had been holding in her seat and squatted next to the doctor, already making quick work of scooping some of the books up.

"No!" The doctor snapped a book shut before Ryder could reach for it, doing her best to stack them more quickly. "I mean to say: no thank you."

"Pshaw, it ain't a problem!"

"No thank you!" Dr. B'Sayle rose to her feet as she shouted, adjusting her skirts and reaching for the books that Ryder had left of the seat. "I really must be going."

"Well alrighty doctor, don't go wakin' snakes."

 _"_ I'd thank you to let me pass, now."

Ryder stepped to the side, turning so the doctor could slide by her. She motioned with her hat -

" _Who picked the hat back up?"_ _"_ _I don't know… you did I guess."_ _"_ _Okay, sure, just checking."_

She motioned with her hat, inviting the doctor to step past her. "No need to get snappy over a hill o' beans."

" _What does any of what I'm saying mean?"_ _"_ _Ryder!"_ _"_ _Okay, I'm sorry. I'm staying quite now."_

The doctor suddenly felt bad about the way she had reacted and looking the gunslinger over, she realized that maybe she had stumbled onto an ally. She couldn't do it all alone. No matter how stubborn she was and how much she wished she could get done alone, she knew that she would need a helping hand.

"I…" Dr. B'Sayle paused, glancing between her feet and the woman's eyes with a proper dose of humility. "I'm sorry for the way I acted just now. Please, sit with me. I have a favor to ask."

Ryder looked skeptical, her eyes narrowing and the freckles crinkling again as she frowned. If she had doubts about the doctor, she kept them to herself and instead motioned for her to take a seat.

Tactfully, the gunslinger chose the seat the aisle across, though she kept her legs in the aisle, elbows on knees as she leaned forward.

"All right, let's hear it, doc."

"I'm a very famous historian, though I'm sure you haven't heard of me. That's okay, I'm not offended. It has taken me years to acquire all these books. Some I have bought at great cost, others I have had to use… less… _savory_ means."

Ryder nodded thoughtfully and adjusted her hat - _whichshehadputbackonherheaderlier_ \- until her face was shrouded. The sun, still stuck between the sky and the mountain range, illuminated her from behind, casting her in an ethereal glow. "And what's in these books that makes them so special?"

"Well, you see…" the doctor paused again, though this time it was because of the smile that threatened to spill over into laughter. Sitting across from the gunslinger, she wondered if she was coming off as too bold.

"Don't be shy now, doc."

Dr. B'Sayle did laugh then and she handed one of the books over to Ryder. It was the one that had been open on the floor, the one that she had been most afraid to let anyone catch a glimpse of.

"These books have illustrated pictures that teach you the ways - the ancient ways - of foot massage."

 _Peebee rolled onto her back and stuck a leg in the air, rolling her ankle as she batted her lashes at Ryder._


End file.
